Where My Boys At?

September 23, 2010 at 7:37 am | Posted in Friends Then and Now | 3 Comments
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It’s pretty much true what they say about girls.  They really can’t get along with each other for the most part.  There’s something so much different about guys and their friendships – a lot less competition, falseness, and cattiness.  A lot less bull shit.  No jealousy and backstabbing.  While the common thought about guys and girls being “just friends” is that it is impossible, that there is always the desire to be something more, I have witnessed this impossibility work many times in my life.

Since about 7th grade, I’ve had healthy platonic relationships with males.  It is, of course, around this age that not only is your body beginning to develop, but your personality is, too, so your friends start to diversify.

Some of my male friends have been better friends to me over the years than my female friends in many ways.  They’ve listened to me and given me the male perspective when I had guy dilemmas and I gave them advice on their girl problems. We’ve been there for each other, talked on the phone for hours, and just hung out doing nothing.

Just like female friends, the closeness disappears over the years.  I remember my freshman year of college. Living away from home for the first time, my close guy friends came to visit my best friend and me a bunch that first semester.  But after that, we only saw them when we came home.  We had such a close-knit group of friends and it was only these guy friends that ever made the effort to visit.  We had all been close for several years so watching the relationship deteriorate was really hard.

Today, I have a lot less close guy friends than when I was young. But I’ve managed to hold on to the delicate few and reunited with some just recently.  I’ve made some guy friends through my boyfriend, but those are in a category of their own for this reason alone.

I hold all my good friendships close to my heart, male or female.  I think it’s important to have a balance of both.  It’s that balance that helps keep me sane.


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  1. so true about girls man. I keep my men close to me yo!

  2. i don’t know. i’m not going to lie. i’m always suspicious of girls that appreciate male friendship more than female ones. yes men are less emotional but i have a sisterly bond with all my friends and i can’t imagine a man being to comfort and understand me in the same way. i’ve never betrayed a friend nor have i been betrayed and i don’t really have day-to-day drama with my friends.

    i think women can cause drama if the wrong group of women are put together. envious, jealous women with low self-esteem. it’s so easy for one woman to want to bring another down because she’s jealous.

  3. sounds like you’ve been surrounded by a good group of women! I don’t have drama with my girl friends now, but the girl friends I had when I was young, ohhh boy. Maybe it’s just where I’m from, which would explain why I’m not friends with lots of people from my hometown anymore.

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