You’ll Understand When You’re Older

January 24, 2013 at 10:10 am | Posted in Life and Living | 4 Comments
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A few weeks ago I was in a club watching some live music with some friends.  At the end of the show, my friends and I decided to hang out and get a couple more drinks.  As we were shooting the shit the way we always do, we made some comments about the age group we were surrounded by.  It was the 20-something crowd, but it was the early 20-something crowd — which in the eyes of a late 20s crew, is a totally different animal, but not far away enough for us not to remember and reminisce about the glory of that time in your lives.  The grass, of course, is always greener on the other side.

So when someone we were with, who happens to be a member of this young group, became offended by our reminiscing and commenting on that age group, I found myself and my friends in a difficult conversation that wasn’t going to lead to any kind of resolution.  Because I know how she felt, but she couldn’t possibly understand where we were coming from, because she just wasn’t there yet.  Still, she felt the need to prove that she could hang, that we were somehow wrong, that we weren’t old.

But that wasn’t the point.  It wasn’t about her and it wasn’t even about us being “old.”  It was just an observation about the change that takes place, that you can’t see until you’ve gone through it, no matter what difficult times you’ve had in your life and no matter how many older people you hang out with.  It is easy to seen now the girls dancing with their boys for the night with their asses hanging out, and the girls dancing on stage vying for the attention of sleazy boys.  I’m still of the age where I really enjoy a good night out, occasionally dancing on stage and the such, but then there are nights like this one in particular when I’m out with my friends and completely content dancing next to the bar while enjoying some good conversation and beverages.

I remember going to the club with a huge crew when I was young.  I remember having a stationery spot by the bar where we could always find each other.  I remember grabbing my drinks there and then going off to see what else was going on in the club.  We always had each other’s backs, saving each other from dancing with someone we didn’t want to, but we were fine going off on our own and coming back together later on.  But now, when I go out, it’s different.  I am not out trying to meet people.  I’m out to enjoy the company of the people I am with.

It’s not about feeling young.  I still get into trouble and get crazy just as I did when I was young.  It’s just interesting to see how things change.

But a young 20-something wouldn’t understand.  She’ll have to wait until she’s older.


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  1. The older I get, the more time spent with friends is comprised of reminiscing.

    LOVE this post. Linking to it tomorrow.

  2. […] Pushing Thirtyy on age gaps and the changing nature of friendships […]

  3. So true! I enjoy my little group now as well, and we also prefer to go to the same bar where we know we can hear each other talk or have a dinner at someone’s home. I guess we are more into comfort as we grow up, not so much into exploring. Good or bad I don’t know.

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