Ghosts of Former Lives

February 26, 2013 at 11:20 pm | Posted in Friends Then and Now | 3 Comments
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This week I had the opportunity to catch up with another old friend – one from my hometown, who moved away a long time ago.  As is a typical move on my part, I always tried to keep in touch, and whenever she visited, I was her go-to person.  It’s a role I’ve played many times in my life to many good friends and I’m happy to keep playing that role.  It’s a part of who I am.

But as life would have it, it has been a good 12 years since we saw each other.  It’s still crazy to me how that can happen, but it can and does, and the sad truth is that I will probably go another long time without seeing her.  It’s not that I don’t want to see her, or that she doesn’t want to, it’s that we live in two very different worlds, very far apart from each other.  I recognized an opportunity to see her through a rare business trip and I jumped on it.  I don’t know when or if that will happen again, or if she’ll find a way to make it back home, or if that’s something she even really wants to do.

Because she took a different path, and her life would have been very different had she stayed. As we compared notes from our 20s we saw lots of parallels.  Had she stayed, we would have continued to hang out, and probably would have gotten in a lot of trouble and had a lot of fun.  Would it be better or worse than what she has now, who really knows, but what she has now is so much to be proud of and I am so happy to see the woman she became.

And it’s amazing that after all these years we still have nothing but love for each other.  I know in seeing me, the only person she has seen from our hometown, that I bring back a lot of memories for her, things she hasn’t thought about in a long time.  I am from a former life.  I represent the past, and since I’ve stayed so connected to it all, I’m able to bring it back for her.

And maybe that’s enough revisiting she needs.  Maybe she’ll come back to visit, but maybe not.  We will stay connected, I know, and I know I will see her again in due time.  In the meantime, I have great memories of our time together in adolescence and peace of mind in knowing that she is in a good place in her life.

I hope to see you again soon, dear friend.


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  1. I hope I’ll be able to say the same for my friends in five years’ time! The nature of friendships has to change and my definition of a friendship today is very different from 10 years ago. I often go months between seeing friends, even those who only live 10 minutes’ drive away.

    • tell me about it! My best friends live 4 hours away and I see them more often than the ones 15 minutes away. It takes dedication, understanding and determination to keep friendships going!

  2. I was just thinking about this today! Since I moved away to university three years ago I don’t even bother telling my high school friends when I’m popping back now since they’ve all had kids and have a whole new life. Now I’m about to graduate and I’m thinking about how likely it is I’ll manage to keep in touch with my close friends now here… I’m hoping with the likes of Twitter, Skype and Facebook we won’t lose touch too easily. Good to hear it can work 🙂

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