Tell Me What to Do

April 7, 2013 at 10:46 pm | Posted in Life and Living | Leave a comment
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I remember the very moment when I felt the most relief I have ever had in my life.  It was right before I walked down the aisle at my wedding.  It was the moment when I no longer had to make any decisions.  I just had to follow directions. Someone was going to tell me where to stand, what to say, and what to do.

It’s kind of strange to get relief from being told what to do, but it kind of makes sense.  I have always been a decision-maker, very assertive and ready to commit to whichever choice I was making.  The world was not going to end if you chose the wrong restaurant, the wrong shoes, the wrong hotel.  As a child, one of the greatest moments is when you finally get the courage and knowledge to say what it is you want to do, and that it’s not what you are being told to do.  It’s freedom in its purest form.

But let’s be honest.  Making decisions is incredibly stressful!  At the end of the day, you are responsible for whatever decision you make.  If you book a flight too close to a meeting and your flight is delayed, that’s on you.  Choosing an apartment, a college, a car, a partner, all of these decisions rest entirely on you.  We look to our trusted loved ones to back up our decisions, sometimes calling on them to tell us what to do, but in the end it’s on you, and if things go awry, it’s on you to fix.

As an adult, this takes on a whole new meaning.  Without a provided structure to guide our time, our roles, our responsibilities, it’s totally on you to make decisions that make sense for your life in the context of the world we live in.  There is so much to think about.  Each decision effects the next and learning from the past while thinking about the present and the future, and all the other factors, is exhausting.

So please, expert on my life, whoever you are, tell me what to do sometimes.  Oh, who am I kidding? I probably wouldn’t listen anyways.

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