Update on My New Place

June 19, 2013 at 8:10 pm | Posted in Life and Living | Leave a comment
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When I was engaged and in the planning stages for my wedding, I had a vision of what I wanted.  It wasn’t anything too extravagant, but it was pretty specific.  I wanted straps on my wedding dress.  I wanted my bridesmaids to wear black leopard jacquard print dresses.  I searched and searched for these things before finding items that didn’t match my vision, but matched me.

Building a home has been very similar to this.  When I first walked into my new apartment, I was already mentally buying furniture and decorating.  I had dreamed of doing this for a while, and having given up on my old apartment a long time, I took this is my chance.  And, similarly to my wedding, I have a deadline.  I want this place to be complete by Labor Day weekend.

But my self-imposed deadline mixed with my very specific vision has once again proven to be at conflict.  I don’t want to wait forever for furniture and I need to get this image out of my head and find things that fit me.  At the end of the day, my desire for decisions to be made in a timely matter beats out my vision of perfection.

Because nothing is perfect.  It would be like trying to find the perfect man.  It’s not that you shouldn’t be picky, but you need to be open to possibilities.

So I am working to let go of my vision.  The first step was purchasing a couch that was not the color I was originally looking for.  This changes everything I had in mind for my living room, and that’s okay.  A week from today, I will have somewhere else to sit in my home besides the toilet, and that’s what counts.

But there is still so much more to go, and I have to remember that my deadline is in fact self-imposed. I have a tendency to put a lot of pressure on myself and I think it is taking a toll on my body.  I know it will all come together in time, and it will be perfect even if it doesn’t meet my vision.

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