Reality Bites

January 8, 2013 at 8:52 am | Posted in Life and Living | Leave a comment
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This past weekend was my husband’s birthday.  He is exactly one month older than me.  That’s right. He hit the big 3-0.  And if there is anyone who is more obsessed with time than me, it’s him.  Being the oldest of his friends growing up, he has never really enjoyed his birthday.  In recent years, we have done a few joint celebrations, and that’s what we have on the docket for this year. So with his birthday passing, I can see mine right around the corner.

And things just got real.  When I created this blog 3 years ago, my hook was life leading up to 30.  I had hopes. I had goals. I had dreams.  I had a plan.  And now that I’m about to cross this “finish line” I can’t help but look back and see how I did.

I remember very distinctly how I felt sitting at my high school graduation.  Sitting and listening to the program, I knew that I was being propelled into an unknown world and that nothing would ever be the same.  I was excited, but I was also nostalgic.  Everything I knew was going to change and I could never really go back to the way things were before.

I want to be able to say that age is just a number, that nothing will really change when I hit 30, but I’d be lying. No, I won’t wake up that morning with a cane by my side, but an important decade will be behind me.  I won’t change overnight, but my plan will change and eventually, my priorities.

I will watch the year go by with many of my other friends also turning 30.  There will be more engagements, weddings, and babies. There may be some divorces, some deaths.  There will be good times and there will be bad, and I will long for simpler times, but I’ll be in good company.  We all won’t be at the same point or even on the same path, but more and more, we will all grow up.

That’s reality.  Reality means I can’t be young forever, though my friends and I will always try to keep each other feeling young.

But it’s not really about being young, is it?  It’s about living, and enjoying life.  It’s a mentality that makes life enjoyable.  Even if you don’t reach all your goals by your deadlines, a positive attitude will keep you motivated and enjoying the ride.

The bite of reality can be hard, but don’t let it suck the life out of you.

Living in the Moment

January 3, 2012 at 7:36 am | Posted in Life and Living | 2 Comments
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Hello, and welcome to 2012! By now you have hopefully recovered from any New Year’s antics (or anti-antics) you have taken part in and are coming back down to the reality that is before you.  Those plans for New Year’s Resolutions kick into high gear.  Gyms will be overcrowded for the next few months. The produce and diet sections of the supermarket will be packed, while fried chicken joints will see a temporary and barely noticeable decrease in business.  But this stuff is never long-lasting.  Old habits die really hard.

When I look at my New Year’s Resolutions from last year (after I write them, I do not revisit them as I hope to have internalized them/forget I actually wrote them down).  I did much better in fulfilling my 2010 resolutions than I did my 2011, because they were more tactical items like finding a new job and moving in with my boyfriend.  Last year’s resolutions were broader scope, true changes in how I live my life, and having started the year without an engagement ring on my finger, it has proven difficult to keep some of these resolutions (namely, giving more and spending “wisely”).  My third resolution — take better care of myself — I think I did okay on.  I did invest a few months in personal training, have always regularly seen my doctors, and do my best to maintain my skin, hair, and nails.

It’s really my last resolution that bothers me a bit.  I’m not sure where my mind was when I wrote it — “Live in the moment more”.  Hm…  I think now I take what is likely a different spin on what this means.  I think it is more about dropping pettiness and jealousy; not taking things personally — being more carefree.  This is something I still need to work on.

But looking to 2012, I’m going to have to spin all of my New Year’s Resolutions of 2011 on their backs and live in the moment more, even if this conflicts with spending wisely.  2012 will brings lots of weddings and related festivities, and I’m sure I am in for a few more surprises.

So my real goal for 2012 is to enjoy all of the parties and trips that have already occupied my calendar and my wallet and just go with it.  At the end of 2012, I will be a married woman and I will look back at my wedding, those of my friends, and all the adventures in between and be able to say, “Now that’s living in the moment.  And now, let’s catch up on some bills.”

All Talk

October 13, 2011 at 8:50 am | Posted in Life and Living | Leave a comment
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This past weekend my BFF visited me from Boston.  We hadn’t seen each other in 2 months, which is about average for us, but a lot has happened in those two months for both of us.  We talk everyday, and update each other, but there’s something about seeing the change in person that makes it more tangible.

So when she said to me after going for a ride in my new car, “look at you doing all the things you said you were going to do,” I knew what she meant.  I’m not the type to not follow through typically, but we all know there are times when a person says they are going to do things and never follows through.

Lots of talk. No action.

See, I make certain to set realistic goals for myself so the follow-through is also realistic.  I have no grandiose ideas about living in a mansion, driving a corvette, and living it up on a tropical island.  Instead, my goals are designed to enhance my life through incremental improvements.  It can’t all happen at once. But it does take drive and determination, and it takes a little talk.

Because I’ve said on this blog some things that I plan on sticking to.

  • I said I’d get rid of shoes I don’t wear, and I have.  About 10 pairs.
  • I said I was going to get in shape.  I still struggle with making time and finding energy for exercise, but I’m making a valiant effort. I still am seeing a personal trainer, and I’ve shed a few pounds and gained some muscle.  I was even told by two women in my life say that my butt was getting smaller!
  • I said I was going to buy a new car, and I did, and I’m certainly enjoying driving more now.

So I really have nothing against expressing your goals.  Just be certain that most of your goals are attainable.  Feel free to hold on to your dreams, though.  Perhaps incremental improvements will help you reach your dreams, too.

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