Life is a Road to Hana

October 23, 2012 at 7:35 am | Posted in Life and Living, Relationship Woes | 1 Comment
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Hey all! I’m back and getting back into the groove of the new normal that is my life.  I feel like it’s going to take some time to adjust to this next stage of my life, and I imagine a lot of it will unfold in the blog posts to come, but for now, a little reflection on my honeymoon.Hawaii is the most beautiful place I have ever been.  I literally was in awe of the natural beauty of the land. I took 400 pictures!

Seeing as it was my first time, I wanted to see it all.  After all, I don’t know how long it will take me to get back there (but I will go back).  So this was not the relaxing vacation I had partially expected, but in removing myself from my environment, I was able to get my mind off all that I was dealing with at home and enjoy the adventure with my new husband.

Many of our adventures involved driving around Maui.  We drove 10,000 feet up the Haleakala Summit, an inactive volcano that is now part of the National Parks system.  We also dared to conquer the infamous Road to Hana: 600 hairpin turns, 50 one-laned bridges, that lead to too many hidden treasures to take them all in.

While the Road to Hana is known for being a daring drive, my husband actually found the drive up the volcano more challenging.  But both trips were worth it.  We were rewarded with amazing views, above the clouds, on the edge of the Pacific Ocean, on top of the world.

The theme behind the famous Road to Hana is this: It’s not about the destination. It’s about the journey.  In fact, the town of Hana itself is quite small. If you blink, you will miss it. And some of the greatest sights you see on the Road are actually passed Hana.  The journey takes a long time, with lots of ups and downs, scary treks down long trails, through water and rocks.  Since you are sharing the road in both directions, you need to be mindful of when it is your turn to cross the one-laned bridges. The Road to Hana requires a lot of attention and determination to reap its many rewards.

In fact, the Road to Hana is an amazing metaphor for life.  Through all the twists and turns, the close calls, the beautiful discoveries and missed opportunities, the realization that you can’t do it all, the realization that sometimes you have to wait your turn, the fear and wonder of entering the unknown, the scary and amazing things you learn along the way, the Road to Hana is all about the journey.  Life is all about the journey, and having someone to go through it all with is the most rewarding gift of all.

Happily Ever After

October 9, 2012 at 7:25 am | Posted in Relationship Woes | 4 Comments
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First of all, huge sigh of relief.  I made it!  I succeeded in getting married!  As my last post may have suggested, this was no easy feat for me.  Tons and tons of stress in planning this day, this life, all leading up to this point.  And the truth is, the stress did not end for me until I was just about to walk down the aisle.  I stressed about things that were really important to me for the day, but in the grand scheme of things, wouldn’t matter.  I was mad at myself for what I was stressing me out, but it’s because I wanted everything to be perfect, like any bride does.  And it was, but not without drama.

The day before the wedding, my (now) husband got into a car accident.  Nothing major, and it wasn’t his fault, but it was clearly not what we needed.  The day before, we had a few last minute cancellations after we had already paid the venue — at automatic loss of hundreds of dollars.  As much as we thought we might become numb to the situation, we really didn’t.  And what really stressed me out was what every bride worries about — the things you cannot control: the weather.  I was unable to have the outdoor ceremony I had dreamed of, but got a window of time to take photos on the beach, by the water, so I was happy.

I really worried that I was going to get sick on my wedding day.  Most of my friends know that I throw up often usually when I’m drinking, but as I was lining up to walk down the aisle, a sudden sense of calmness came over me, and I think I know what it was.  Finally someone was directing me.  Finally I was not responsible for anything except being a good host and having a good time.  Being told when to walk, what to say, when to say it, was comforting to me after making so many decisions blindly on my own.

And going through the night was surreal.  It was crazy to watch every one of my plans come together nearly exactly how I pictured them.  I did my best to listen to the advice from former brides, to take time to take it all in, and I really did.  I didn’t drink too much and because of it, I remember each choreographed  moment and each surprise moment.  It was not a blur like I had been told.  I know a lot happened that I don’t even know about yet, and I look forward to hearing all of those stories.  But here are the moments I will remember:

I will remember looking into my husband’s eyes during the ceremony as they filled with tears.  I’ll remember the person who I saw most during the ceremony.  I’ll remember hearing the words I had read over and over again on the script.  I will remember taking shots of tequila instead of wine when we did the Jewish blessing.  I will remember the first dance, being introduced as man and wife, my best man and maid of honor’s beautiful speeches, my father’s speech and our dance.  I’ll remember my impromptu solo dance to Tom Petty’s Free Falling.  I’ll remember the most hilariously awful hora I have ever seen in my life.  I’ll remember the blow up penguin being tossed around the dance floor.  I’ll remember the wobble at the end of the night with my bridesmaids and bachelorette crew.  And most of all, I’ll remember the love that I felt in the room as my friends and family celebrated the next step in my life.

There will be more to come as I digest the fact that I’m really married.  But for now, I am off to my honeymoon and, for the first time in the history of Pushing Thirtyy, I will not blog while I travel.  I will miss this space for a couple of weeks, but am looking forward to coming back refreshed with stories from a far away land, and wedding pictures!

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