July 17, 2012 at 6:43 am | Posted in Life and Living | Leave a comment
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In taking the traditional steps in wedding planning, I have scheduled the regular pre-wedding activities including a bachelorette party, rehearsal dinner, and of course, a bridal shower.  I have been calling upon my bridesmaids for ideas and opinions, providing them with regular updates on my overall planning, and my bridesmaids can attest to the fact that I’m organized and clearly taking control of most of the planning, probably almost to a fault.

I know that this may make it sound like I’m being controlling bridezilla, but that’s really not it.  Two of my bridesmaids live in Boston, one who is actually getting married this weekend, and all of my bridesmaids are busy people.  I don’t want to add too much stress to their lives.  I want them as bridesmaids to support me, not to take on a whole bunch of planning.

But this doesn’t mean I’m not listening to them or giving them responsibilities — I certainly am, and have gotten a lot of great ideas from them.  What it does mean is that I am not expecting any surprises.  I know when my shower is, where it is, and basically everything about how the day is going to go.  And I prefer it that way.  I don’t do surprises all that well, or haven’t ever really had anyone really surprise me.

Of course there is a bit of a double standard in this because I love surprising people.  Aside from an awesome surprise shindig I pulled together for my fiance’s birthday a few years ago, a notable surprise when was I took my best friend to see her first Broadway show.  We made it within blocks of the theater before I accidentally blurted out the surprise.  Usually I’m pretty good, but these things happen.

I’m not sure why I don’t do surprises well.  I think a lot of it comes down to never expecting anything from anyone.  So I think in that way I will be surprised time and time again by people’s thoughtfulness and generosity.  I don’t ask for much from anyone, so I plan to continue to be surprised by the humanity portrayed when it is least expected.

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